Why I gained 8 pounds back: quit the never ending cycle
I gained 8 pounds. I was just at my 70 pounds of weight loss and I gained 8 pounds back...ughjhalskdh
As frustrating as it is and a little embarrassing to announce it, I needed to hear it out loud. A while back I talked a little about making a lifestyle change. When I first thought about it, when someone would post about their lifestyle change, or I would hear about one I kind of just thought "oh they are working out and eating healthy." I never truly understood what it meant exactly to make a lifestyle change. It is so much more than just eating healthy, or working out. I mentally had to commit to myself. Part of my lifestyle change is keeping myself accountable for my actions. As much as I didn't want to step on the scale, or announce a failure on my part, I knew I had to face the facts.
It hurt to see the amount of weight that came back and in such a short time, when I had been working so hard before. I felt like I just wasted time and effort. I was so mad at myself. Why the heck did I let this happen again? How are things going to be different if I actually don't change?
Like I said on my Instagram post earlier, we just sold our house, were homeless for a week in between moves and moved into a new place with a baby and two dogs. Life does happen and its okay. What matters is what I am going to do about it. There is one more thing though, in order for me to make that change. I need to figure out why I gained the weight. You see, those things are really stressful and totally understanding, but I can't just have an excuse and brush it off completely otherwise I know I will do it again.
As I think back during that time, I remember having no time at all, exhausted, frustrated, nervous and my brain was just scattered everywhere. When I look at it that means I had no plan for myself and I did not make it a priority. Moving gets crazy, I think we all know that, so what I should have done is made a plan. I have talked about it before and I am a total hypocrite, an honest one at least! Where I could have saved myself the heartache and pain of loss hard work would be if I had just written down my "fast food options." I easily could have written down five different places where there was a healthy option when I had no time to stop what I was doing and no food around to make anything. That right there would have been a super easy solution right? I will tell you right now, in my head this is exactly what I thought "I don't have time, I am starving, the baby is starving and we need something cheap and quick. I can eat whatever right now, I deserve it anyways, its going to get me through the next few hours." and then off Spencer went with my order in at sonic. Had I not even opened that door and looked at a piece of paper with a written plan of fast food options it could have gone a little more like this..."okay, I can have a salad here, or a GF sandwich here. An omlete from here kind of sounds good..." And I am sure Spencer would not have minded making one extra stop to grab me the food I could have used to fuel my body instead of just feed.
In that one minute of panic and hunger I decided not to care. I decided it wasn't a priority and within seconds an old habit uprooted itself. You have to be thinking "okay one time whats the big deal?" Opening that door gave all the other opportunities the okay. I obviously put my health aside and went for comfort food each and every time I had the opportunity to.
Life happens and pants get a little tighter, there is no good reason to beat yourself up over it. Just wake up the next day and get back into things! Everyday is a fresh start and an empty stomach waiting to be filled with some delicious fuel. However, LEARN. look back on that last month of sonic, wendy's, TACO BELL and Texas Roadhouse. Note what you felt like and why you chose not to put your health first, so that way the next time you are faced with another "move" in your life you know how important it is to make a plan.
Remind yourself how to talk yourself out of falling back into all your old habits. This lifestyle change is so much more than just working out and eating healthier. Mentally you fight a battle everyday to chose from a healthy fruit from your fridge to just popping in some fruit snacks in your mouth real quick. Looking back at everything I know my simple answer was an answer I already knew, but am now completely understanding now, how important a food plan is!
I gained 8 pounds because I did not put my health first, I let life take control while I was on pilot mode. Sometimes we need pilot mode and it really is just what we need at the time, but when we stay in pilot mode, don't learn from our mistakes and brush off the excuses that's when you feel trapped and can lose sight of your goal. I am so glad I stepped on the scale. I needed to write this out and motivate myself to keep going. 90 pounds is a lot of weight and its a long process, I knew there was going to be a time where I would get distracted because I am human, at least now I just have to focus on 30. 30 is a lot less than 90 and I have gotten this far! After I am done writing this out, I am going to grab a pen and write out a new plan for myself. I have learned and I am taking action today, right now.
-Kayleen
As frustrating as it is and a little embarrassing to announce it, I needed to hear it out loud. A while back I talked a little about making a lifestyle change. When I first thought about it, when someone would post about their lifestyle change, or I would hear about one I kind of just thought "oh they are working out and eating healthy." I never truly understood what it meant exactly to make a lifestyle change. It is so much more than just eating healthy, or working out. I mentally had to commit to myself. Part of my lifestyle change is keeping myself accountable for my actions. As much as I didn't want to step on the scale, or announce a failure on my part, I knew I had to face the facts.
It hurt to see the amount of weight that came back and in such a short time, when I had been working so hard before. I felt like I just wasted time and effort. I was so mad at myself. Why the heck did I let this happen again? How are things going to be different if I actually don't change?
Like I said on my Instagram post earlier, we just sold our house, were homeless for a week in between moves and moved into a new place with a baby and two dogs. Life does happen and its okay. What matters is what I am going to do about it. There is one more thing though, in order for me to make that change. I need to figure out why I gained the weight. You see, those things are really stressful and totally understanding, but I can't just have an excuse and brush it off completely otherwise I know I will do it again.
As I think back during that time, I remember having no time at all, exhausted, frustrated, nervous and my brain was just scattered everywhere. When I look at it that means I had no plan for myself and I did not make it a priority. Moving gets crazy, I think we all know that, so what I should have done is made a plan. I have talked about it before and I am a total hypocrite, an honest one at least! Where I could have saved myself the heartache and pain of loss hard work would be if I had just written down my "fast food options." I easily could have written down five different places where there was a healthy option when I had no time to stop what I was doing and no food around to make anything. That right there would have been a super easy solution right? I will tell you right now, in my head this is exactly what I thought "I don't have time, I am starving, the baby is starving and we need something cheap and quick. I can eat whatever right now, I deserve it anyways, its going to get me through the next few hours." and then off Spencer went with my order in at sonic. Had I not even opened that door and looked at a piece of paper with a written plan of fast food options it could have gone a little more like this..."okay, I can have a salad here, or a GF sandwich here. An omlete from here kind of sounds good..." And I am sure Spencer would not have minded making one extra stop to grab me the food I could have used to fuel my body instead of just feed.
In that one minute of panic and hunger I decided not to care. I decided it wasn't a priority and within seconds an old habit uprooted itself. You have to be thinking "okay one time whats the big deal?" Opening that door gave all the other opportunities the okay. I obviously put my health aside and went for comfort food each and every time I had the opportunity to.
Life happens and pants get a little tighter, there is no good reason to beat yourself up over it. Just wake up the next day and get back into things! Everyday is a fresh start and an empty stomach waiting to be filled with some delicious fuel. However, LEARN. look back on that last month of sonic, wendy's, TACO BELL and Texas Roadhouse. Note what you felt like and why you chose not to put your health first, so that way the next time you are faced with another "move" in your life you know how important it is to make a plan.
Remind yourself how to talk yourself out of falling back into all your old habits. This lifestyle change is so much more than just working out and eating healthier. Mentally you fight a battle everyday to chose from a healthy fruit from your fridge to just popping in some fruit snacks in your mouth real quick. Looking back at everything I know my simple answer was an answer I already knew, but am now completely understanding now, how important a food plan is!
I gained 8 pounds because I did not put my health first, I let life take control while I was on pilot mode. Sometimes we need pilot mode and it really is just what we need at the time, but when we stay in pilot mode, don't learn from our mistakes and brush off the excuses that's when you feel trapped and can lose sight of your goal. I am so glad I stepped on the scale. I needed to write this out and motivate myself to keep going. 90 pounds is a lot of weight and its a long process, I knew there was going to be a time where I would get distracted because I am human, at least now I just have to focus on 30. 30 is a lot less than 90 and I have gotten this far! After I am done writing this out, I am going to grab a pen and write out a new plan for myself. I have learned and I am taking action today, right now.
-Kayleen
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